and i'll savour every moment of this.

Run, run fast enough to lose yourself.

2008-11-09T02:10:00.001+08:00

A little fall of rain.

2008-10-04T10:48:00.003+08:00

It has been almost 2 months since I last posted something here. Time flies. Just a while ago I was stuck in the PW humdrum, where days and nights were spent on the Written Report. It became some kind of.. reflex action every time I woke up or got home, to turn on the computer, open up the microsoft word WR document, and then work on it for at least 5 hours each time.

And right after the submission of the WR was the Promos. There was barely enough time to study, mainly because so much time was spent on PW. And then Promos ended almost as quickly as they had started, and there was kind of a holiday for a week.

And now it's back to the regular curriculum again. We're starting on the lectures, test papers are coming back soon.

I think what I'm typing here is starting to get disorganized. For now PW Oral Presentation has to be settled. ): I think the next thing that I look forward to is Christmas! :D

I wish I could just let it go.

And lapse into the ways of misery.

2008-08-26T21:59:00.002+08:00

... And today, she asked if I wanted to transfer to another school.

Bad things happening one after the other. Even though I received an apology for this one... Still the damage is done and I can't get over it as easily as I wish.

Spiralling to the ground below,
Like Autumn leaves left in the wake to fade (away).
Waking up to your sound again,
And lapse into the ways of misery.

Dead to the world.

2008-08-25T23:54:00.002+08:00

Today, my mum told me that I could screw my A levels and opt to study overseas if I continue getting so caught up and affected by all this... shit.

I seriously don't know what to think anymore.

Tight Rope.

2008-08-15T22:31:00.003+08:00

Weekends are here again.

Previously I'd always look forward to the weekends. Now, the thought of weekends just comes along with the dread that I'd have a million more things to do than the average weekday. The never-ending cycle of trying to catch up on lectures/tutorials during the weekends just worsens. Unfinished work, new work, more work. ):

Sigh. Weekend Horrors. I doubt I'll have enough time to study for promos.

You're made of ice
I pay the price
For all your unforgiveness

Antidote.

2008-08-10T17:56:00.005+08:00

Thank goodness for this National Day break. It came just in time for me to recover from my recurring headache/lightheadedness and my flu. Although I think it's still not enough for me to completely recover from the effects of long-term sleep loss, I think it should still allow me to recharge for week8's SPAs. ):
I still can't bring myself to, but I guess that you would rather it to be like this anyway. And I probably deserve to feel bad for as long as it could take.

Just over the rainbow in the sky.

2008-08-03T00:50:00.003+08:00

My heart and I have wondered aimlessly
Beneath the weeping willows searching for the sun
Time after time we've met each other in a dream
And we have gazed upon the miracle of love

My heart and I have heard the angels sing
And we have found upon life's broken wing
And now we know that love is
Just over the rainbow in the sky

Mother comfort us, in thee we trust
Have mercy on my heart and I

My heart and I will know no happiness
As long as we see hate and bitterness
And like a child we close our eyes
Do not forsake us when we cry

Mother comfort us, in thee we trust
Have mercy on my heart and I

Your laughter weeps the truth.

2008-07-28T19:30:00.003+08:00

The 2 weeks to come will be pretty stressful.

I have to go through Math tutorial, Chem tutorial and Physics tutorial and Econs notes myself because I missed those lessons. Other than those, there are several GP tasks to complete throughout the whole of this week. And there's PW that is due next week and it takes up so much time. Work aside, there's class Learning Journey on Wednesday, Floorball IHC is on Tuesday and I might be taking part in some Track/Field IHC. To add on, there are Econs and Chem tests on Tuesday, Math test on Thursday, and GP test on Friday. Not forgetting that PW Individual EOM consultation is probably next week so I have to find a suitable article + do the write-up by then too.

Wow. ):

21.

2008-07-22T21:40:00.002+08:00

Floorball season is over. Played our last match against NJ today and it was a well-fought match. I'm glad we ended off the season pretty well, and that we got another chance to play after the YJ match(which was played really really really horrendously).

Focus on what's to come, instead of what has gone by and is impossible to change.

Well done, RJFloorball!

Ah, so much work accumulated over the weeks. )):

2008-07-20T20:20:00.003+08:00

Deserted again.
You speak to me through the shadows.
Walking in closed rooms, using cold words.
Captured by the night.
The yearning escapes from my embrace.

Strange silhouettes whisper your thoughts, scream your sadness.
And they all turned away,
unable to face more of this death.

Credence in my word.
Written in dust, tainted by memories.
I confess my hope, recognize my loneliness.

Your laughter weeps the truth.
Push me into corners.
Confirming the epitaph of my soul
and displaying the once unknown karma.

I can't believe it all had to end up like this. I was just thinking about it, and suddenly it dawned upon me and it all made sense. And it took so long for me to realise that. I'm so dense. I can't stand it. I feel so sorry that it became like this. It was my fault. I probably deserved it anyway. I want to fix it. Yet I can't bring myself to. Can't even bring myself to start with that tiny action.

And now I'm reduce to putting it down in this space where hardly anyone reads. Stuck in a pit with a ladder. I know how to get out, yet it's so hard to.

I just..
Can't.

Awaiting word on what's to come.

2008-07-20T13:54:00.000+08:00

Can't seem to catch up on the lectures and tutorials I've missed since the start of the season. Maybe I'm not using my time efficiently enough.

Work aside, I'm so glad that I finally managed to say it. I can almost feel that heavy feeling in my mind lighten up already. : )

Heal myself-a feather on my heart
Look inside-there never was a start
Peel myself-dispose of severed skin
All subsides-around me and within

Walk in shadows under the sun.

2008-07-17T20:43:00.001+08:00

I know not the words to make you stay
Yet they are engraved on your face
This secret language I cannot speak
Only whisper on the breeze

Something about you will make me stronger.

2008-07-14T22:35:00.000+08:00

Deep within me
Life’s crawling and wasting my days
Another night gone and I know there will be another way
I’m leading myself to be free
In this eternal goodbye

From the shelter of your home, as you walk into the rain.

2008-07-14T01:05:00.001+08:00

And i don't know
Why you feel so bad
Where is the life you once had?
And still this horrid feeling grows and grows
The way you want it to

I cling to my past (like childish dreams).

2008-07-10T21:26:00.002+08:00

Icy roads beneath my feet
Led me through wastelands of deceit
Rest your head now, don't you cry
Don't ever ask the reason why

Nightmare.

2008-07-07T11:45:00.007+08:00

I had a terrible nightmare.

I was in this fenced up area of a really dark forest, and there was this disgusting creature-human thing with super wrinkled-up and blood-all-over skin and really sharp teeth pursuing me. It was this strange screwed-up hide and seek game where the monster and I took turns to take 5 steps each, counting aloud. I was gradually losing at it cause it was evident that the monster was getting closer and closer to me.

Then I came to this scene where the monster and I were on the same bridge already (I was at the end and it was at the start). And suddenly out of the blue this.. group of mysterious beings cloaked in white approached the monster and just.. brushed past it. And then it was back to getting away from the monster again. The last thing that happened before I woke up was that I was hiding in this cupboard in this abandoned house and the monster opening the cupboard.

I went back to sleep again and I redreamt the bridge scene. This time, all the white people except one brushed past the gargoyle and that one white person actually confronted the monster and helped me to stall time. The white person eventually got owned but still enabled me to buy some time. The last thing I remember was wondering whether I should find a better place to hide, or to phone someone for help.

If I keep getting more of these crazy dreams frequently, I think I'm going to die in my sleep. D:

Burden

2008-07-07T00:43:00.002+08:00

I, once upon a time
Carried a burden inside
I sung a last goodbye
A broken rhyme I had underlined
There's an ocean of sorrow in you

A sorrow in me

I saw a movement in their eyes
That said I no longer knew the way
I had given up the ghost
A passive mind submit to fear
And the wait for redemption at hand

Waiting to fail
Failing again

If death should take me now
Count my mistakes and let me through
Whisper in my ear
You have taken more than we've received
And the ocean of sorrow is you

2008-06-25T18:30:00.000+08:00

20 more miles in the rain
20 more getting drained
I can't redeem myself
But I still can figure it out

20 miles in the rain
20 more getting sane
I shouldn't reveal myself
But I still could figure it out

2008-02-28T23:24:00.003+08:00

Chem lecture test was.. terrible.

GP test tomorrow. And it's not going to be too good either.

Suddenly I feel like I've been having a lack of rest.

Higher than hope my cure lies.

2008-02-17T10:51:00.003+08:00

Weekends just fly by so quickly. Especially when the bulk of your Saturdays are always taken up.

Struggling with Econs now, since I can't seem to take in what the lecturers have been saying. Bah. And I have to write a freaking essay by Wednesday, and Monday and Tuesday I have class camp. This is not good.

Sigh, so much to think about. It's like everytime things get settled, new issues surface. But I guess I'm kind of glad that things haven't gotten so bad that I would actually hate school.

I really hope my timetable doesn't change (much) and my class won't get reshuffled.

Cause it hurts to be alive, my friend.

2008-02-06T19:18:00.000+08:00

Finally, it's the CNY break. Still trying to cope with school and new schedules. Plus I think I'm falling sick especially since the weather now seems to be going a little insane. It has been soo windy and cold here. Kind of reminds me of Taiwan when I went there last year.

I feel so wasted. And subconsciously stressed. Not sure about what. There's always this little thing at the back of my mind bugging me.

Feel like I'm stuck in some pit.

Cruel winter chilled the bud, and stole my flower too soon.

2008-01-21T20:49:00.000+08:00

I don't think I'm coping very well with school so far. Just a few weeks and I already feel that.. fatigue around my eyes.

Once this week is over, I'll either feel even more stressed or very much relieved.

2008-01-13T13:34:00.000+08:00

Just got a call from chorale. Kay, I've made it in. This is too soon. 1st auditions on Thursday, 2nd auditions just yesterday and today I know already. Headaaaaaaaache.

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line.

2008-01-13T10:51:00.000+08:00

Okay, so I haven't blogged for a loooong loooong time.

Taiwan trip with JJ was really fun. It was full of long bus trips where both of us always ended up with neck aches after falling asleep during the bus journeys. I had no autoroam but some hotels had internet services so we spent our nights rotting on MSN. Visited many night markets over there. The shopping centres over there sold stuff that were really really costly. Took many pictures, but I'm took lazy to post anything up.

This year's Christmas came really quickly but I guess it's cause I've been so busy with the concert preparation and rehearsals. I don't know why but I felt that that spirit of Christmas joy was somewhat lacking this year. Perhaps it came too swiftly for me to soak up the spirit, or maybe it was something else. I don't know.

And school's started as well. I got posted into BB05 T'orres! At first it really thought that orientation would be something really really really mindless and boring but I guess things turned out better in the end. Got posted into a _ class. Really detest it. (Maybe my perception will change, but I doubt it will change very much.) The timetable's rather okay. Ending at 1.30 on 3 days and 3.15 on the other days. Not too bad. At the very very least I've got a good friend in my class and I suppose that some other people are fine as well. I don't know how I'm going to survive PW. CCA is going to be such a headache. Actually, I think I'm already having a big headache from school.

Don't think I'll blog very much anymore. Cause school isn't that interesting and I'll probably get busier. Some things are already (inevitably) starting to change. I guess there's no other way but to let them be. Without my OG and the good friends I can turn to, school would be hell.

Think I'm losing my voice. Can't believe it's monday tomorrow already.

2007-12-02T17:26:00.000+08:00

2 days left till I'm leaving for Taiwan.

2007-11-25T18:06:00.000+08:00

I shall not drink champagne on an empty stomach again.

A little piece of heaven.

2007-11-23T22:36:00.000+08:00

There's a wedding mass tomorrow, which means I have to wake up early at 7am.

Darn it. I think I'll need 5 alarms.

Leads me into darkness and emerges into light.

2007-11-22T16:36:00.000+08:00

sloth day #??.

I overslept till about 1pm today. Had lunch at 3pm. Been having a headache on and off for the past few days. I hope it's not the flu jab.

Christmas is coming, and I can't wait. : )

So it hurts to be alive, my friend.

2007-11-20T12:58:00.000+08:00

Ah, I think I'm coming down with the flu symptoms from the flu vaccination last thursday. Having a runny nose + slight headache. Gah. My mum's making me clear my sec4 stuff to pass to my cousin. The dust is making me sneeze like crazy. :

My eyes feel swollen now. Darn.

Stargazers

2007-11-17T15:09:00.001+08:00

Lazy. To. Post.

Besides, nothing much has happened during the holidays yet.

Got Nightwish and A7x and Sirenia albums recently. Looking for Kamelot and Soilwork. They are so expensive in hmv. Ah, nothing else to type about. Confirmation mass later.

Shall post again when there's something to talk about.

My kingdom corrupt with dissent.

2007-10-29T10:52:00.000+08:00

I've been too lazy to post anything lately. Megadeth concert on friday was really brilliant and quite an eye-opener.

.....Okay. I still feel too lazy to blog. So I shall just post some pictures.

It was the United Abominations World Tour but most of the songs played that night were their greatest hits. Songs played included Sleepwalkers, Skin O My Teeth, Washington is Next, A Tout Le Monde, Wake up Dead, Hangar18, Gears of War, She-Wolf, Never Walk Alone...A Call to Arms, Symphony of Destruction, Trust, Peace Sells, Holy Wars...The Punishment Due.

Okay. I should start revising chinese now. Refer to http://buddingglassjar.blogspot.com/ for a more detailed post on the concert.

K I'm out.

We Come Out At Night.

2007-09-25T21:08:00.000+08:00

So yesterday I was working on the research report. And this little portion of it required me to look for research papers which stated that bananas contain Auxin. So the document was really really hard to look for cause the search engine kept turning up results for the effect of auxins on bananas, not the presence of auxins in bananas.

And finally I found a website which had this sentence that I needed: Bananas are curved because of the phototropic chemical Auxin which makes them grow towards the sun.

So I was really happy and excited that I had finally found the reference that I needed, so I clicked on that search link. And it brought me to this webpage: http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1690846

Okay, the reference turned out to be some freaking comparative essay between Bananas and Katanas, wtf! In case you're too lazy to open the link above, here's the page:

"Bananas and Katanas: A History, And Comparative Essay

You may have once thought that Bananas and Katanas were not particularly similar. Late one night though I had a thought; maybe they aren't? I immediately began to mentally note down similarities and differences between the 2 objects.

The Banana

Definition
from http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=banana

Ba·na·na
n.
1. Any of several treelike Asian herbs of the genus Musa, especially M. acuminata, having a terminal crown of large, entire leaves and a hanging cluster of fruits.
2. The elongated, edible fruit of these plants, having a thick yellowish to reddish skin and white, aromatic, seedless pulp.

The Banana tree is actually not a tree. Strictly speaking it's a herb, the stem of the tree does not contain the substance we know as wood. This would lead one logically to believe that the banana itself is actually a herb. Not so. The banana itself actually contains seeds, but because it's commercially grown the seeds have been genetically modified enough so they are barely noticeable. So in fact the banana is a fruit and a herb.
According to the July 2000 edition of New Scientist, we share half our DNA with that of bananas. Makes you think really.
Bananas are curved because of the phototropic chemical Auxin which makes them grow towards the sun. Bananas like most other plants contain Chlorophyll which has a green pigment, this absorbs the green from natural sunlight and is used in photosynthesis. When bananas ripen, we see them turn yellow. This process of turning yellow is a result of the deterioration of the membrane of the chlorophyll. Once the protective membrane is gone, various enzymes act on the Vitamin A in the banana to produce its yellow colour.

Nutritional Information (100g) (Information will vary per banana)
Calories 95.0kcal
Carbohydrate 23.2g
Protein 1.2g
Fat 0.3g
Fibre 1.1g
Vitamins:
A 3ìg
B1 0.04mg
B2 0.04mg
B6 0.36mg
C 10mg
E 0.3mg

The Katana

Definition

Japanese swords are measured in `Shaku'. Each `Shaku' is around 12". Blades longer than 2 Shaku are considered to be katanas. A katana "is only a katana if it is worn blade-up through a belt-sash" (from wikipedia.org)

Here is a labelled picture of a katana: http://www.blades-uk.com/images/links/swordinfo.jpg

A Brief History

The katana (pronounced ka-ta-na) is a curved single-edged sword traditionally used by Japanese samurai. According to legend, the Japanese sword came into being around AD 700, and was invented by a man named Amakuni. The first recorded production of a katana was around 200 years later in AD 900. These swords were used regularly in bloody Japanese battles until the 15th century where guns effectively rendered the sword useless. The Japanese were reluctant to give up their technology so easily, and while guns still ruled the battlefields Katanas were still made albeit more decorative than functional. When the dictator Tokugawa Shogunate came to dictatorship he isolated guns and gunpowder and removed them from circulation. This lead to the rise of the Samurai as the top of their feudal cast system.

In 1853 Commadore Matthew Perry dragged Japan kicking and screaming from their isolationism to the real world. Funnily enough guns came back in a big fashion. The Haitorei edict put a stop to this banning all guns and swords and once again the Samurai class were all but crushed. They hated the edict and took arms and the resultant uprising against military dictatorship. They re-enstated their once figurehead emperor and nationalism rampaged through the masses. All this nationalism lead to World War I and the general abolition of Samurai. During the American occupation of Japan in WWII the Samurai Class was completely disbanded and concequently the use of Katanas was no more.

Katana Composition

The katana consists mostly of Iron and Carbon, often known as Carbon Steel, but often has traces of manganese, copper, titanium and tungsten.

Similarities and Differences

The Words: Banana and Katana have the same number of syllables and the vowel sounds used are the same in each word. Note: I am basing this on my own accent (Thames Valley). This may not of course apply to you.

The Shape: Both have a half crescent shape. If you hold either correctly, the pointy bit points towards you. There are 2 reasons for the Katanas shape; the first is that the curved outward shape is stronger (demonstrated in Car Windscreens and The Surface Tension of Water). The second is that the samurai were often found on horseback and it's easier to slay thy enemies with a curved sword. Bananas are curved because of the phototropic chemical Auxin which makes them grow towards the sun.

Diet: Aside from all sorts of vitamins, the banana is an excellent source of potassium. The highly volatile metal ironically helps us regulate our blood pressure and maintain our bodies' fluids.
The katana is an excellent source of Iron.* Iron mainly flows about our blood, giving its red pigment to the Haemoglobin. Haemoglobin as we know ferries around oxygen in our bodies. Without Iron, haemoglobin can't do its job; adults become sluggish and lethargic, while children suffer from ADHD-like symptoms. Iron is also crucial to proper muscle function.

Exports: Bananas are a major export of such countries as Dominica, Columbia, Guadeloupe and Panama. None of these countries are terribly renowned for exporting katanas, nor is Japan for its banana exporting. In this way at least they are dissimilar.

Beauty: It is my belief that every single thing that nature has created is beautiful in its own way, be it aesthetically, functionally or evolutionarily. Only things that man create or destroy are unpleasing to experience. For example the city of Slough in southeast England. Katanas by reputation are things of beauty. Each one is painstakingly folded and refolded, the hilt is decorated lavishly and the sword itself is engraved at the hilt.

Colour Change in Production: The banana changes from green to yellow as it ripens (explained above). The sword changes colour too, the metal is heated to the point where it glows red then hammered into shape.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*When licking katanas, I advise you lick the blunt side.
Note well; I will not accept responsibility for injuries caused by licking swords or anything else you do as a result of reading this Writeup."

Argh, the little background information and history about the Bananas and Katanas were okay. But at the end where they had the similarities and differences between the bananas and katanas, I was just like !!!!!!!!. I swear I wanted to pull out all my arm hair already.

K nevermind. I did manage to find the proper reference I needed after all, and the webpage did let me have a little laugh, heh.

I didn't attend school today. Have a fever/headache/strong detest to going to school when there's double-block chinese. And well, my day was pretty much wasted away but I did get some work done and a pretty good rest. Today was a pretty bad day to not attend school cause now I need to give 4 letters of absence to the teachers. 1 to the form teacher, 1 to the PE teacher, and 2 the the respective 2 Options teachers. Gah.

And you that I defend, I do not love.

2007-09-23T17:18:00.000+08:00

Gah, it's already evening and I still haven't started on my research report. Great.

Another hot day today, despite the heavy rain in the morning. The heat gave me quite a headache. Spent the afternoon having lunch and then accompanying my dad to look for a camera. So it's kind of a day gone since I didn't do anything school-related today. Darn it.

Maybe I'll get to the report later. Maybe. ><. I don't even know when it should be due. Shucks.

Currently my computer is lagging like crazy. Whatever I type over here never appears until 3 seconds after I stop typing. Crap. Actually the computer has been lagging like crazy for the past 2 weeks. Really annoying. ~~I think it's my dad's little evil plan to try to force me to reformat the computer since I didn't want to reformat earlier.~~Now I think I'm gonna have to back-up about 12GB of my files, including 7GB of music. Argh. Thankfully I have a 40GB external hard drive. It's gonna take ages to transfer the files into the hard drive though.

Anyway, my brother and I are planning to get an xbox. So we're gonna go crazy saving for quite some time. Therefore, people who owe me money, please pay up now! Thanks.

An Epic of Time Wasted.

2007-09-21T20:16:00.001+08:00

I detest today's timetable. PE is right before CLE and it's usually held in the hall or kschee so we all have to wear our pinafores over the sweaty icky pe attire. And because of that, when the sweat eventually dries off, your skin feels so freaking sticky and gross.

Had RS meeting with mrlim after school today. Bah, lots of changes have to be made to the RS report draft. While most of the rest of the cohort has finished RS like, 5 months ago, we still haven't even submitted our final report. ><

Badminton with yikai and nat (and sheena for a few minutes) later. That was pretty fun but it added on to my stickiness. So by the time POF class started I was so sticky and sweaty and smelly and red. Thankfully class was on rocket-launching so it was outdoors in the field. That, of course, further added on to the stickiness factor.

So after school, by the time I got to bsh for training I was already 40 minutes late. Training was rather slack, coming to think of it, but I felt like I was going to die even after only 1 set of multishutters. :l.

Bad experience trying to get home after training today. I was in the middle of the bus queue and waiting for the 410 and suddenly I realised that I forgot to bring my wallet. I decided to leave the queue by climbing out from the back since the left and right were already so packed full of people. The people around me were giving quite _ looks, but well it's not like my exit caused any harm to anyone though I think it would really look rather strange. Not the extent of strange that would deserve a _ look though.

So I decided to resign to fate and walk home. Then on the way through j8 I met kuoying and borrowed 55c. : D. In the end I caught a bus home. Except when I boarded the 410, I was like, oh crap, since the bus driver had to be The One. That particular one. The _ particular one. So she demanded for my ezlink card or else I'd have to pay 90c. So I was like(in chinese),'huhhh, but I forgot to bring my wallet (that's why I have no freaking ezlink card) I'm a ~~freaking~~ student." And all she did was to shake her head and stare at me. Argh, this is the 3rd time she's doing this to me okay and during the other 2 times I was in uniform. Do I look like an adult? Crap. And even an adult wouldn't wear a school uniform just to pay 55c for a bus ride.

Okay lor. So I have to go and borrow lor. I actually wanted to demand for the 55c that I dropped into the coin machine back and just walk home after all, ~~but screw it(since I can't get the coins back)~~. So I had to be thick-skinned and ask some lady for coins. She seemed pretty reluctant and I even called her twice before she finally responded. Oh poor lady with a black face, I'm so sorry I made you 35c poorer today.

Back home. Feeling crappy about RS Report. (and Studying for Math Test, to some extent.) K, I'm going to cool off and eat&drink this coconut my mum plucked from the coconut tree downstairs.

Darkness Surrounding.

2007-09-20T18:54:00.000+08:00

Breakfast with Nat in the morning at Macs. Met a few niners there too. The morning was pretty nice and cool.

Had nice hotcakes and we ended up cutting them into shapes. I kind of regretted getting coffee though cause it's pretty bitter and I don't quite like coffee. Nat poured maple syrup into my coffee (!!!) but it didn't help much.

1. Ugly star thing.

2. Spastic Smiley

3. Nat's Butterfly

We added syrup to fill the butterfly and smiley later. (As you can see I accidentally stabbed the smiley in the forehead with a fork.)

Remains of the smiley.

Walked around wheelock place for a while though the shops were all closed. On our way there, we found this:

Underdog!

Took a closer look at it:

Sing-nga-purr?

Had one hour of math lesson and then went for Options class. L&P was spent watching The Shawshank Redemption. Was pretty interesting but towards the end of the lesson I was going to explode already. ><

Went to the library later to find Nat and we went to the canteen to eat before the next class. POF was pretty okay but I'm already starting to get a little confused with the calculations, argh. We went to launch rockets after that and my group's rockets were all zzz cause yikai rowena and I were just fooling around for the entire lesson and laughing about our rocket's noobness. Our rocket never flew past 3m while other rockets flew like 8m++. -__-. Tomorrow we're launching rockets using some kind of water pressured pump or something so our rocket should be better.

After POF lesson, Yikai and I went to play badminton. Played for like 2 hours so we finally left school at about 6pm. My right hand's index finger is still numb since 2 hours ago and it's really annoying and wouldn't go away though I've been moving my finger for the past 2 hours already.

K my mum made sushi for dinner today. Not bad, except that the rice falls apart almost completely the moment I take my first bite into it.

The art of subconscious illusion.

2007-09-19T17:55:00.000+08:00

I'm down with a flu + cough since yesterday. Slept practically the whole of yesterday away.

Today's lessons passed pretty quickly. Had a pretty good rest last night but I was strangely still dozing off during math for the first time this year. After school, Nat and I just hung around in class doing work and for the most of it, we were distracted by the "Hello Panda' and flicking it to and fro. After that we added a little wall to it so it became like a 'Hello Panda jump over the wall' kind of game.

Options later. Had POF (which was half gone by the time lesson started, since the sec1s left the classroom so late) and then went to the tennis courts to play tennis with Elaine for a while. The weather was so freaking hot and I got slightly sunburnt just from being under the sun for half an hour. Elaine got chaota though, heh heh.

AIC later and we couldn't find the classroom. By the time we found out lesson was in the AVA room, only 40 minutes of lesson was left.

K, I think I'm going to go type my 'achievements' (Huh, what achievements?) for the testimonial. How nerve-wrecking.

Lips of deceit.

2007-09-17T22:54:00.000+08:00

I daresay that I was half-asleep throughout the whole of today. Fell asleep during AIC class today, gah. I hope I didn't miss out on much. Argh I feel so lethargic but I managed to finish the 3 entries of the POF logbook. Okay I did take a 2 hour nap earlier but now I think I'm tired again.

First lesson of Law&Punishment starts tomorrow ~~and I hope it isn't boring or else I'll CMI and fall asleep in class again or something.~~

On a random note, a7x's 'Sounding the Seventh Trumpet' sounds so raw. A little like EPs and a little messy. But they improved by leaps and bounds by the time their next album came out. :)

Oh man, we're having netball carn practice so often now that I think I don't have enough shorts to sustain throughout the week. Crap.

Can't you take me away from your lies?

2007-09-16T22:40:00.000+08:00

First week of school. I've been returning during the late afternoons or early evenings.

I managed to change my POF class so I end at 4, 3.30, 4.30, 3.30, 4 on the respective days of the week now.

Options have been pretty slack so far. POF requires a logbook as part of the graded assessment and there are no notes given, bah. And the AIC one is just plain confusing cause of the many facts and information and well, basically the lack of contextual knowledge.

The first week has been rather uneventful. Math test on Wednesday was horror. There were 4 questions and all 4 were pretty screwed. On Friday we had PE lessson and Nat and I played tennis and we hit the ball out of the whole court 4 times and had to go down to the first level to get the balls/get the sec1s to throw them back up to us. We're getting better at tennis. At least we can get a few rallies going now. Had math lesson after PE. I shall quote from Nat's blog since I'm rather tired and annoyed after Internet Explorer hung on me 3 times in a row.

"math was cool! mr teo practically let us off half an hour early. clee and i went down to the canteen and realised that we needed to lose weight (tshyeah whatever) cause when we both bent to the side to pick up some stuff i dropped, the whole table lifted up on the other side and almost flipped over. hilarious stuff. and then crystal did more noobish things and we couldn't stop laughing."

Philo test after that was okay but someone kept sniffing throughout the entire thing and it was pretty annoying. Argh. One of the most annoying things during tests other than the irritating sound of heels and teachers staring at your work.

Hung around in class for a while after the test and Nat was using the computer so I went over to see what she was doing and she offered half of her seat to me. I didn't realise that she had moved her chair more to the side so I just fell all the way down. T_T. (Yes, yes. Noob, noob. Oops, I did it again.)

Went to Temasek Poly for POF to build some glider thing. They demonstrated how to construct the model plane in like, 5 minutes? And then we assembled our own planes in about 15 minutes in groups. Spent the next hour++ trying to fly the planes individually. Very very very slack. I actually thought it would be a pretty intensive workshop. Dang, should have left earlier man.

Had to go to school really early on Saturday for netball carn training. Was okay I suppose. Went to eat lunch at Hans with Peiting, Yumin, Yanyee, Dharsh, Yuxuan and Tianfei after that. Mass was okay and choir night prac was pretty tiring.

Sunday. Woke up late. Had lunch. Went home for a while and borrowed air pump from my neighbour to pump the class netball. Went to Nat's house. :D. Took a 165 from Upper Thomson and it was really really unexpectedly fast. I took only 20 minutes or so to get to her place. We spent most of the time watching tv, and watching the a7x All Excess dvd. :D. Ate ice cream waffles after that for dinner and we watched a little more tv before I left.

Okay, now I'm back here and thinking about the POF logbook. The weekends passed too quickly. Darn it. I don't want to go to school tomorrow.

What are they going to do when the lights go down?

2007-09-08T23:01:00.000+08:00

right arm + stomach muscle aches.

now I can't even laugh properly. :

school's actually starting soon. dang. term4's going to be such a screw-up. argh. at least the september holidays was kind of a nice holiday cause it was the first time in a long, long, long, long time that I didn't have to return to school.

argh. I hope that I can swap POF classes.

Discolours all with tunnel vision.

2007-09-07T20:47:00.000+08:00

ARGHHHHHHH#H#() U)G#()TG( U)#U()R)U(#FOIA FOAMKFAALMK_T#@.

wth do these things happen altogether?

dammit.

options timetable just came out today. the earliest i finish lessons is 4pm on monday. and from tuesday to thursday i end at 6pm. friday, 5pm. @#(&^%. the only positive thing is that i got all the options that i bidded for. currently my timetable is like

monday - 2 to 4 (Arab-Israeli Conflict)
tuesday - 11 to 1 (Law&Punishment), 2 to 4 (Arab-Israeli Conflict), 4 to 6 (Physics of Flight)
wednesday - 4 to 6 (Arab-Israeli Conflict)
thursday - 11 to 1 (Law&Punishment), 4 to 6 (Physics of Flight)
friday - 4 to 5 (Physics of Flight) [waste of a friday, crap.]

i think normal lessons like chinese, math and pe end by 11am? so im going to have to burn most of my afternoons at starbucks or something, drinking coffee while waiting for the option lessons to start. wow.

sucky timetable. great, now i look forward to term4.

2007-08-27T16:13:00.000+08:00

tired. tired. tired.

bad day today. cause i really really really felt like sleeping throughout the day. after writing the gonghan i even stoned at the essay questions for 20 minutes cause i couldn't decide what to write.

thursday and friday were slacked off doing no mugging cause i was being such a procrastinator. mugged chem on saturday and on sunday. bah i can't believe i survived a whole sunday just on 3 hours of sleep the previous night. i went to sleep at 12am but i couldn't sleep till 4am. bah.

chem tomorrow. i'm not exactly excited that its the last paper tomorrow. i feel so nonchalant. like i don't really care anymore? i'm not sure. too stoned for anything most probably. maybe i need to go to escape soon to get some adrenaline rush or something.

Critical Acclaim

2007-08-23T14:56:00.000+08:00

tuesday - english paper 1, bio
wednesday - SS, english paper 2
thursday - physics, history

monday - higher chinese paper 1 and 2
tuesday - chem

sheesh, i can't wait. but now's mugging for chem i suppose. gahh.

feelings of exam stress just don't seem to dominate anymore. I think it's just cause we're too used to having exams already and we're numb to the stress? I don't know whether it's a good or bad thing. (haha nat, slackerz inc.)

ohh. and much overdue pics from singfest should be coming up after tuesday i hope.

poooo. can't stand studying for subjects that teachers never taught basic foundations properly for. argh. Emo Index 79. (haha, yea right.)

If the world is so fair, why do roses have thorns?

Dismantle me down, Repair.

2007-08-02T22:17:00.000+08:00

week 6 is ending. week 7 would be half gone because:

6/8/07 - rgs choir concert at esplanade
8/8/07 - national day celebrations in school
9/8/07 - singfest (a7x!)
10/8/07 - school holiday

and that eventually leaves only one more week of lessons before week 9. this is coming too soon. argh. it seemed like just. 3 weeks ago that term3 just started or something. and in 2++ freaking weeks its the final year exams already. s_ _ _ man, s_ _ _. the class isn't even in the 'omg eoys are coming already' mood. maybe it's because eoys are coming too quickly, like time(thum, lol.) got fast-forwarded or something. i'm pretty sure many people in other (more) mugger classes have already started mugging or something.

my mind tells me i'm so screwed since i haven't started revising and all. but i don't even feel much pressure from the fact that exams are coming. it's like i've already become numb from all the stress from tests and all that i've become pretty heck care and unfeeling once again. oh, and did i mention that i pretty much screwed english orals up? argh.

sheesh. i feel.. unfeeling. (no, not emo.) i'm currently trying to rip nat's cd into the computer and the disk drive is making such painful agonizing sounds as if it's going to explode inside or something.

Isn't there a better word to use than the 4-letter 'S' word?

2007-07-30T18:33:00.000+08:00

three weeks to the end of year exaaaams. it's coming so soon, too soon.

tried lucas' banana drink on saturday and it was pretty good. :D.

oh yea. check out this website. http://www.blackle.com/.

"Blackle was created by Heap Media to remind us all of the need to take small steps in our everyday lives to save energy.

Blackle saves energy because the screen is predominantly black. "Image displayed is primarily a function of the user's color settings and desktop graphics, as well as the color and size of open application windows; a given monitor requires more power to display a white (or light) screen than a black (or dark) screen." Roberson et al, 2002

In January 2007 a blog post titled Black Google Would Save 750 Megawatt-hours a Year proposed the theory that a black version of the Google search engine would save a fair bit of energy due to the popularity of the search engine. Since then there has been skepticism about the significance of the energy savings that can be achieved and the cost in terms of readability of black web pages.

We believe that there is value in the concept because even if the energy savings are small, they all add up. Secondly we feel that seeing Blackle every time we load our web browser reminds us that we need to keep taking small steps to save energy."

soooo, technically my blog is saving energy. (black blog and metal band don't equate to emo btw.)

okay back to the happenings of the wonderful monday.

today's lessons were pretty much crap. argh mondays. math and english were just insane and throughout math lesson i was trying so hard not to laugh. (reasons shall not be disclosed here. :D) i think i haven't laughed that hard for ages and ages already so it felt pretty good though my stomach was really aching after that. well english was just plain retarded cause the teacher left us in class on our own to practice for the english orals this wednesday(S_ _ _!!) and nat and i were just reading the passages in all sorts of accents. (pronounced and stressed as AKsent, okay whatever.) we even had some crack-voice version and a screamo-like version which was really really noisy. but the whole class was in chaos and really noisy already anyway so we didn't really contribute (pronounced and stressed as kenTRIByut, okay okay whatever.) to the racket.

omg. there's this little swell on my lips which hurts like wts_ _ _ . argh argh argh. i have no idea (ay-DEE-er) how it got there. the entrance of its presence was just so subtle (SUT-L) but its already (orl-RED-di) such an irate (eye-RATE). argh.

kk. shall go do my history essay tonight. right after i completed one, i have to do another. (s_ _ _.)

2007-07-24T19:10:00.000+08:00

freaking headacheeeeeeee. i think its because of the chilly weather. i pretty much like the weather this way though.

nothing much happened today i guess. we had tennis for pe today. man, i swear the racket is so hard to control. sheena and i hit 2 tennis balls out of the school to the road next to the courts. :X

okay i think i shall go back to work now. argh history pt. its really really making me go insane.

As I walk through the valley
Of the shadow of LA
The footsteps that were next to me
Have gone their separate ways
I've seen enough now
To know that beautiful things
Don't always stay that way
I've done enough now
To know this beautiful place
Isn't everything they say

it's currently my favourite song for now. : ). i think, i'm going to get another a7x album.

Like you imagined when you were young.

2007-07-19T22:54:00.000+08:00

okay excellent... i just spent about 3 or 4 hours pasting little squares for history pt. argh. its so freaking time consuming. and the squares weren't even exactly little, nor were they really the same size (or shape, heh heh heh). argh. and i only finished pasting the sky. wow.

well done, well done. this project is driving me mad. oh and today we learnt this really cool sign for physics. (yes denise, i've finally learnt this.)

Fleming is sooo cool yo.

it's racial harmony day celebrations in school tomorrow. which means slack (but also means dragginess). going to support judo competition with nat (and peiting, yunting and charlene?) tomorrow after school. and uhh. hair cut. hope it doesnt screw up.

and cbox is driving me mad too cause i can't read or post anything. gaaah.

uhhhh. ~~peace out~~ magnetic field going out?

2007-07-18T18:05:00.000+08:00

the weather's finally pretty cool today, unlike other days of the past few months. and im pretty awake today. maybe it's cause i napped for 5 hours yesterday. : / (And forgot to send sandra my part for the SS essay.)

i'm actually revisiting my rock and indie music library after so long since i'm not supposed to listen to metal for this term. and currently i'm listening to TAI which nat sent me.

argh. everyday's more or less the same. morning. tired. lessons. home. tired. homework. sleep. the same old cycle all over and over again.

okay i should go do some homework now. darn it's actually week5 next week. too fast.

31 days left to the eoys. gah.

This all was only wishful thinking.

2007-07-16T15:40:00.000+08:00

tiring day. i went straight home after school today. was hoping to take a nap but i had to rush out my chinese book review before meeting jo later to go to mediacorp.

baaaaah. so tired. workload's increasing slightly. gah. why can't cca just stop from july and not august? argh. can't seem to find time to start on my history pt. so screwed.

nat and i created faggy and uh. mrs faggy today by ~~destroying erasers~~ carving them out of erasers.

no time to talk about them today. shall elaborate some other time.

i haven't listened to taking back sunday for a really long time i think.

And will you tell all your friends,
you've got your gun to my head?
This all was only wishful thinking.
Hoping for the best just hoping nothing happens.
A thousand clever lines unread on clever napkins.
I will never ask if you don't ever tell me.
I know you well enough to know you never loved me.

or am i wrong?

~~argh i want to hear a new metal albummmmmm.~~

Feel the world has let you down somehow.

2007-07-12T20:03:00.000+08:00

oh man. i just woke up from a 2 and a half hour nap. yea today was a really tiring day for me cause i slept pretty late the previous day trying to complete the ss ppt. but somehow i didn't sleep in any class.

after school at 1.20 like 2/3 of the class went down to waffletown for lunch. :D. the stuff was okay, not exceptional or anything. and the portions weren't very big for the price. D: nat and i shared two waffles. : )

okay i feel so brain dead now. shall go do some chinese homework. hua yu cool.

What are we gonna do when you've stopped crying?

2007-07-11T19:26:00.000+08:00

omg chinese orals sucked like craaaaaaaaazy.

the topic was something about the increase of GST recently. so the teacher said GST in chinese. and i didn't know that it meant GST. so i was like GG. but eventually she told me what it meant (GST, ~~duh.~~) but i still didn't know what to say. so i just blanked out and was like GG crystallee all the way.

kk, enough of that. painfully excrutiating 4 minutes of sheer torture on the mind.

need to do SS ppt now. today was kind of a fulfilling day. and surprisingly i don't feel tired ~~yet~~.

I colour in the world I see.

2007-07-10T18:11:00.000+08:00

arghhhhh. im so so so annoyed. ):

i was so hoping to take my chinese orals today. but the teachers had to go on and on about some weekend (shitty) homework that comprised a whole mock paper and some, book review shit when i think most people weren't paying attention cause well, we were panicking about the chinese orals and all. so the teachers talked and talked. and in the end there was only 15-20 minutes left and only 5 people managed to take their orals. gaaaaah.

i know im whiney and all about this (small) issue but my generaly mood for this week aint very good. gah.

2007-07-09T16:45:00.000+08:00

okay. so the last week was a really busy week for me and the weeks to come are gonna be worse. ate suki sushi buffet with yunting, peiting, crystalchng, pingfang, zhiying, jasmine yesterday. it was pretty good but i swear that towards the end of the buffet i ate till i felt like dyingg. argh. plus being bloated really drives you mad. cause we were laughing over small issues/nothing while eating.

cantored on saturday and it was pretty okay i guess. just glad i didn't screw up. : ) good luck denise for next week : )

today pretty much sucks cause i was soo tired. i was nodding off during first block history lesson today and the teacher caught me and said something like. good morning! oh man. and i just stonned back at him. philo was torture cause it's boring and it was hard to keep awake or even concentrate. physics was uh. crap. nat jo and i were coming up with random lines to form a story about juliaroberts, jessicaalba and stoves that make chicken noises and produce chickens. -_- nothing much happened during english. just got a little annoying, as usual. math was free block cause the teacher wasn't here and we decided to watch frankenstein. seemed pretty interesting : )

after school nat and i went to taka to get ice cream. it kind of cheered me up a little cause i had been feeling really gah and tired for the entire day. : ) went to hmv later to get some cds. nat got some TAI albums and i actually bought a rock album in like, an entire year, after getting metal cds during the entire time. got the boy with no name by travis. yes. very random. but i just felt like it. metal isn't going to make me feel positive so it can wait till after exams.

bus ride home was drowsy. was nodding off and luckily i didn't hit the glass beside me. : /. oh yea. saw someone at a certain bus stop along the way home while on the bus and im so thankful that i wasn't taking 132 or i would have to get down at that bus stop. gah.

kk now im back home. eating my lunch at 4.30pm. taking a nap after. so messed up. i still need to do ss ppt later. GG. and i wish i were artsy. then i would actually want to start doing my history pt. wow.

good morning crystallee.

2007-06-29T22:11:00.001+08:00

okay extra post for today cause i feel like it.

i have this bruise on my thigh from knocking into my table while moving through the dark. : D. oh i adore bruises. : D. and no im not being sarcarstic.

haha this convo cracks me up.

nate. says (10:03 PM):
lol i just found my putt putt travels through time cd!! and i think i'm gna play it now if it works teehee
nate. says (10:03 PM):
i'm stoned and headachey. perfect cure okay
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:04 PM):
HAHA OH MAN
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:04 PM):
okay okay
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:04 PM):
i'll go look for my puttputt cds now
nate. says (10:05 PM):
playing now! TEEHEE wheee
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:08 PM):
oh shucks i can't find my puttputt saves the zoo ) :
nate. says (10:08 PM):
noooo ): my putt putt travels through time tune is almost correct! i think i had a zoo one too but i can't find it either!
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:09 PM):
arghh i can't even find my freddie fish cds
nate. says (10:10 PM):
NOOOO wait lemme see if i have mine. the awesome thing about the game is that it pauses IF i choose to start a convo with someone. whee ok i shall go search!
nate. says (10:12 PM):
i found my freddie fish! at least one of us has it yay
nate. says (10:12 PM):
and the theme hospital one
nate. says (10:12 PM):
and the zoombinis i was telling you about
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:13 PM):
YESSS
Sing for absolution. (A starlight in the gloom; I only dream of you, my beautiful.) says (10:13 PM):
must play after eoys
nate. says (10:13 PM):
YAAAY HAHAHA YES YES WE MUST WHEEE

A starlight in the gloom.

2007-06-29T20:58:00.000+08:00

friday is always a tiring day.

class phototaking this morning. and i was in the second row : D. like finally after 9 years? eh wait, class phototaking in st nicks dont really count cause we get to take pictures at cool places around the school like the koi pond, unlike boriiiing rg where the pictures are all taken at the old school gate. : / okay so i was in the second row but oh well, it isn't much of a deal anyway cause the first row only has 6 people and that makes me the 7th shortest in class. woots. D:

chem spa was such a screwwwwww up. damn i dont know whether it was cause of the lack of sleep last night or whether i was panicking during the test or whether i just suck at chem. okay, i think it's the lack of sleep and the fact that i simply just suck at chem. sux0rz, wtf.

training was a little screwed up too. so many of my shots were going out of court argh. it was either that or that i didn't hit the shuttle properly and only the feather hits the frame, argh. screwwww. oh well. physical training was a little shitty. we did (jogging 50m + running backwards 50m) x 10 continuous sets. then it was (all sorts of different agility exercises x 6) x 2 sets.

pfft, training today has made me stink big time. soo gross. shall take a bath now and maybe i'll sleep earlier tonight.

2007-06-28T15:15:00.000+08:00

today's the earliest in 2 years that i left school. : D. no research studies block after school today so we could leave at 1.20 : ).

i totally didn't sleep in class today, yay. : ). math test was quite a bummer. i mean i knew how to do all the questions but i just didn't have enough time to finish one question plus i made careless mistakes. : /

the day passed pretty fast i guess. went to taka after school to get pretzels to eat : ) and then i took the 162 home. this woman came up at the next bus stop and sat next to me. and before she sat she was like adjusting the air-con thingy to change the direction to face herself. D:. wth. and throughout the whole bus journey home i swear she was moving her head 85% of the time. left right left right up down whatever. it was sooooo annoying.

k. i think i shall

1) finish up on my chem pt
2) take a shower
3) do chinese compo D:
4) take a nap? okay this is tentative.
5) study chem spa

oh yay, tomorrow's a friday.

I'm sorry but I'm just thinking of the right words to say.

2007-06-27T22:15:00.001+08:00

sleeping earlier tonight cause there is math test tomorrow. i'm so careless at differentiation that it's driving me mad.

agenda for tomorrow:

finish up chem pt
study for chem spa
do chinese essay?

and the weekends shall be spent mugging for bio essay and coming up with an idea on how to do my history pt.

heh heh. i'm so uh, organised. : /

oh, class phototaking was pushed back to this friday and it's right in the middle of stinking pe. (again!) wth. not to mention it's floorball again so i think i'm going to be red in the picture. :o

2007-06-26T18:47:00.000+08:00

second day of school today. it was slightly less tiring than yesterday. started the day with social studies and it was a combined lesson with another class. was pretty blah and my group was talking/laughing almost the whole way through.

second block was chinese and i just slept the whole lesson through. : / the chinese teacher used permanent marker to write on our board and at the end of it all he couldn't erase the words. lmao.

PE after that and we played floorball in the (insert adjective here) hot sun. it's so chiong la. but definitely not as chiong as soccer. (i think?) after the floorball module would be tennis and i'm so gonna be so noob at that cause i'm so bad at angles.

bio and history were just like okay as always and i'm pretty glad i didn't fall asleep during those lessons. : ). math was last block and the teacher wasn't in school so nat, ink and i spent the bulk of it playing lame games like soccer on paper/creating math (trigo or circular measurement or algebraic equations) problems from random pictures/sick hopping eraser game. don't ask me to elaborate on what we were doing. it was just spastically funny.

went to taka/wisma after school with nat to buy some stuff and now i'm back home. i'm considering whether i should take a really short power nap before i do chem pt (again, gahhhhhh).

2007-06-25T15:28:00.000+08:00

first day of school was pretty tiring, but i guess it's because i didn't exactly have enough sleep last night, especially after 4 weeks of waking up at noon.

i managed to keep awake in all the lessons except physics though. i swear i was paying 100% attention during the first 40 minutes of class.

skipped cca cause i was far too tired to actually do anything more. : / i'm probably going to do chem pt later on (argh!) after a little nap.

i can't wait for term3 to end. 8 weeks more to go till the end of year exams and i'm scared yet eager. : /

You're so brilliant,
don't soon forget.
You're so brilliant,
grace marked your heart.

:)

There is a light that never goes out.

2007-06-24T11:30:00.000+08:00

argh school is starting. ):. and i haven't gotten enough of holidays yet. kayaking during june camp has just made my tshirt tan even more obvious and added a whole new collection of insect bites to my arms and legs. i swear most of them are not mozzie bites. they are soooooo itchy la. i scratched some until they are bleeding already. ><. ah well. mozzies and other insects that love to bite love me. even ants, argh.

so screwed, so screwed. no work/studying done during the holidays. : O. i think term3 will be so screwed.

went for rock for wayne yesterday. it was okay la, except the scary mosh pit and random crazy guys pushing people around and climbing on random people's backs and people carrying people around. pretty scary cause it could get quite violent. and i think levin from ronin is pretty uncool. sheesh, i thought he was actually cool at first. : / okay i shall go do some redemption work to make up for doing almost nothing during the holidays.

And if a double-decker bus
If it crashes into us
To die by your side
Is such a heavenly way to die

And if a ten-ton truck
Kills the both of us
To die by your side
Well, the pleasure, the privilege is mine

aha i like this song for now though the lyrics crack me up sometimes. : )

2007-06-14T00:07:00.000+08:00

Losing sleep, In too deep.
Fading sun, What have I done?
Came so close to what I need most,
Nothing left here.

2007-06-03T01:32:00.000+08:00

my right shoulder and right thigh are aching. : /. and i swear i'll never eat durian before training again. gah.

i'm a little red from being sunburnt. poooo.

Lost are the days of Spring.

2007-05-31T23:04:00.000+08:00

this is one of the worst days in my life. or at least my life till today.

and feeling sad somehow only gets me angry.

By the pain I see in others.

2007-05-29T23:04:00.000+08:00

it's the holidays, finally!! i have been like a snail crawling endlessly to the finish line and yes! i have made it!!

tomorrow i have to go back to school to collect my report book. my gpa is agony. the pain is throbbing within me, causing me to feel misery!

holidays - a time meant for relaxing. but NO! MY HOLIDAYS ARE FILLED WITH ASSIGNMENTS - AGONY, PAIN, MISERY.

I NEED TO DISTRESS! RELEASE ME FROM MY SUFFERING!!

okay sorry. typing like the above is getting tooooo gay for me to take. i feel evil. so i shall stop. watched pirates today. it was a pretty good movie. : ). and yes, i need to go to school at 8 tomorrow to collect my report book and face my horrible gpa. bummer. : / . math remedial after that until the afternoon too. double bummer.

pooooooooooooo. my right eyebag is getting more and more evidently larger than my left eyebag. hur hur hur.

And pray to God he hears you.

2007-05-20T22:29:00.000+08:00

because everything's in such a mess.

2007-05-18T11:06:00.000+08:00

so I didn't go to school today, again. had a fucking headache this morning so I decided not to go. I'm in such deep shit cause I'm going to use up yet another letter. this is damn screwed. I mean people don't go to the doctor everytime they are unwell especially when it's something minor and they already have the medicine. crap, man.

so I'm pretty much jaded from school. pissed off from cca. and upset about results. I shall not elaborate about those 3 stuff here. cause crystal lee should always learn to stfu. whatever she says doesn't make people happy. so one person unhappy > many people unhappy. that is damn logical.

So all three decided to come in at great impact at the same time to fucking bother me. Screwed up headache. dammit. I'm so frigging vulgar here but I really damn damn pissed off and upset and stressed out. I'm thinking of doing something about some stuff but it's kind of hard to go about and I'm afraid it wouldn't work out.

2007-05-13T01:35:00.000+08:00

so thursday was actually spent in school, having physics and chem remedial lessons. (argh). then stayed back to paint the class banner for ora stall on saturday. it's nice. : ). chilled out with sherry, arathi and peiting after that. lunch + toyrus + random walking around. went home. took a quick bath. went out again. caught some malay horror movie at marina. haven't watched a horror movie for ages so i was pretty much freaked out though the effects weren't really good and some parts were actually unrealistic and lame. and it seemed pretty budget. cause the sound effects were really overused.

got home pretty late. then i was too tired to wake up the next morning for school. didn't really feel like giving a shit about school. so i decided not to go. (damn, wasted yet another letter. and i have no more to spare. blah) training later after not touching my racket for almost 2 weeks. almost died, man. super zapped of energy by the time it was physical training after that. blah. and my arms are actually feeling funny from lobbing and that hardly happens. my thighs are also feeling funny after the sprinting physical. okay, muscle aches aren't really aches to me. they are just funny feelings. like the pain makes me laugh, just like bruises. oh i kind of like them both. i dont like cuts though. it's a searing pain. (it's pretty late and i'm tired. hence, the rubbish.)

saturday. went to school for ora. boring as usual, nothing compared to st nicks fun fairs. : /. it was mainly all about food, food and food. sheesh. no cool stuff. i say it's a food fair not a fun fair, man. damn i missed my class booth shift cause it was at 9 but i thought it was at 10. ah well. we managed to sell off everything. : ). took a bus down to far east with some classmates. by the time we reached far east, sherry and i had to leave to get to thomson cause she has ballet and i have church.

oh sheesh. i'm so tired i don't feel like typing anymore. this post is a little incoherent. : /.

and, it's happening. but i don't want it to. damn. i don't even know whether it's a good or bad thing.

2007-05-06T12:56:00.000+08:00

你
的泪光
柔弱中带伤
惨白的月弯弯
勾住过往

夜
太漫长
凝结成了霜
是谁在阁楼上
冰冷的绝望

雨
轻轻弹
朱红色的窗
我一生在纸上
被风吹乱

梦
在远方
化成一缕香
随风飘散
你的模样

菊花残
满地伤
你的笑容已泛黄
花落人断肠
我心事静静淌
北风乱
夜未央
你的影子剪不断
徒留我孤单
在湖面
成双

花
已向晚
飘落了灿烂
凋谢的世道上
命运不堪

愁
莫渡江
秋心拆两半
怕你上不了岸
一辈子摇晃

谁
的江山
马蹄声狂乱
我一身的戎装
呼啸沧桑

天
微微亮
你轻声的叹
一夜惆怅
如此委婉

菊花残
满地伤
你的笑容已泛黄
花落人断肠
我心事静静淌
北风乱
夜未央
你的影子剪不断
徒留我孤单
在湖面
成双

菊花台 - 周杰伦

okay, i never listen to chinese songs. but i really really like this one. : )

and digress time is over, i ~~want~~ NEED to study history.

2007-05-05T01:31:00.000+08:00

and so the midyears started today with english and ss. i thought english was okay, but ss was screwed up. but well, eventually both would be screwed up anyway. and it really annoys me when teachers scrutinize your scripts, like they are looking for something wrong or something. i mean, i'm sure they are just curious or something but it really makes me feel really uneasy and distracted. and the sound of high heels is really distracting as well. grah. nevermind.

so there was combined band prac after school today. we ate at rjc canteen for lunch and it was really really strange. like we were quite extra but nevermind. and i think rjc food isn't very much better than rgs. boo. the campus is pretty cool but it's going to be really really big compared to rg. we need to learn a new score for gdop and it's really hard and all of us think that we are damn screwed. deadline to learn (and play well) : in 3 weeks. = GG.

so because of this i probably can't go for training for a few more weeks to come. : /. okay so after prac i met zhimin at kallang for dinner and then we headed to the indoor stadium to watch the aviva open. men's matches are far more interesting than the women's matches. its just faster and with more powerful strokes and smashes. so that = more suspense and excitement. okay nevermind. some dude dashed to the sidelines to change his racket in the middle of the game cause his racket string/frame broke or something. bold move. it was quite cool though that doubles pair lost that point. and lin dan lost to ponsana after a long long match where zhimin just couldn't take the suspense anymore. hah. so everything ended at about 9.30pm and we koped the plastic clappers that were left behind.

okay. weekends will be spent mugging history and math. it's like i've even refrained from going online. or at least talking on msn. this midyearexam stress is giving me adverse skin conditions. i hate stress. i don't really feel it crushing down on me. but it really causes me to get outbreaks. >=( . anyway. my current skin condition is just gross. i'm currently having an outbreak and my skin is really really dry and flaky. disgusting. and don't argue that i'm not having an outbreak, because pimples are pimples and pimples don't lie. ah.

my history and math are sooooo screwed. sheesh. i can't wait for the holidays to come, but that would also spell pts and worrrrk. plus june camp, but im pretty neutral about that. no pbb, thankfully, cause i don't want to kill myself.

i wish i could go on a holiday without worrying about the work i have to complete back home. : / . work is always done. but sadly, work is also always given. so work never = 0. how sad, but too bad.

2007-04-27T23:59:00.000+08:00

this blogskin looks and feels so emoooo that i can't really take it myself. but i like the layout. and i like the band. so band > emo. okay i didn't really understand that but nevermind. so pretty much has gone by. mid years are coming up and term 2 is going to end. time flies. i don't even know whether that's a good or bad thing.

increasing workload. and my grades are declining pretty badly. just got back the 3 science papers a few days ago. i didn't do well at all. but I guess I'm numb to the disappointment already.

aaaaand. i'm pretty much annoyed since yesterday. for the benefit of peace(and other reasons), i shall just stfu.

napfa was pretty much a disappointment. call me a perfectionist(though i'm not that at all in many many many other stuff) but i'm not satisfied with 29 points, especially when it was only 3 more cm to an A in sbj and i've been getting a perfect score for 3 years. screwwwwwit. ):. oh well. something to work for till next year. at least it's something I don't detest.

rs report due next week and i guess it's hardcore chionging for the report this weekend. gah. mid years in 2 weeks and I don't exactly feel prepared. been falling asleep in class and that's nooooooot good. i guess some teachers just speak like they are singing lullabies. irony is that i totally dont want to sleep but I just can't help it. so pretty often i get those muscle spasms/fits before I jolt awake from my semi-conscious state of mind which screams at me to wake up. ink thinks it's creepy. i think it would look scary.

and it's not as if i sleep late. or that i don't get enough sleep. i mean i get 7 hours on average of sleep. and the next day i just feel like i had a fat cow sitting at the tip of my eyelids. I think what matters is the time i wake up, not the amount of sleep i get. waking up and seeing darkness gets me demoralised every morning.

I don't like school. ):

training has been reduced to only once a week. kind of a good thing so I have more time for my work. so I guess I have to go jogging more often on my own.

aaaand. I've been hooked on to this song. I think it's kind of mainstream. but welllll. (metal is still > than others)

long walk home - this day and age.

finding myself in a place i've never been
where i don't know myself or anyone else
i can dream about the past
or i can just let it go
i lost track of time five days ago

what is it about you that makes me want to stay
is it all the love
or isit just the pain

don't leave me now
we've come too far
just to set our eyes on a new star
i'll ride on clouds
till you come down
just promise me you'll always leave the ground

in the drivers seat is my self-esteem
where i know that the heart should be
i'm cleaning off these shelves
to show you how i've changed
and if all goes well tonight we'll call for rain

i'm moving pass the past
at the slowest of speeds
hoping that our loves
exceeds our insecurities

don't leave me now
we've come too far
just to set our eyes on a new star
i'll ride on clouds
till you come down
just promise me you'll always leave the ground

finding myself finding myself finding myself finding myself finding myself find yourself
i'm running in circles
it's you i'm thinking of
and if you don't want to talk
then this isn't love
a new destination
i'll say my goodbyes with my back turned to you
at least i know we tried

don't leave me now
we've come too far
just to set our eyes on a new star
i'll ride on clouds
till you come down
just promise me you'll always leave the ground

: )

seawinds.

2007-04-01T21:14:00.000+08:00

sabotaged by grace yu! -

These are the rules: Each player of this game starts out by giving 6 weird things about themselves. People who get tagged need to write in a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state the rules clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. After you do that, leave them each a comment letting them know you tagged them and to read your blog!

Here goes :

1) generally, sleep > work and fun for me when i'm tired. (which is like most of the time?)

2) generally quiet and stoning most of the time. but i'm actually thinking okay!

3) i like food but i kind of hate the process of eating cause it somehow wastes time.

4) generally i dislike most flying objects, as in insects. especially UFOs.

5) metal is pwnz0r. : D

6) i dont comb my hair 50% of the time in the morning.

6 people to join the game:

T_T. eh, no?

autumns monologue.

2007-03-21T13:35:00.000+08:00

having muscle aches all over your body really sucks. cause you don't want to do anything but lie down and stone around and not move at all. >:.

so anyway. was supposed to go to school today for some LJ week. but i wasn't feeling well since yesterday so i decided to give school a miss. not that i actually miss school. :.

and i want to study chemistry today but the muscle aches are killing me. i don't even want to move an inch argh. this is killing my mood. my mum wants me to go for the eye checkup and backbone checkup today BUT I DON'T WANT TO. argh.

i want an ice cream but my throat is hurting badly. ):

here's to the eve of the day which will never come.

2007-03-04T02:43:00.000+08:00

ah. i'm hooked on heroes. : D.

if i were to have a superpower, i want to be able to complete my homework and revise work just within a glance.

okay. so i have a lot of homework and my eyebags are freaking resurfacing. okay. not that they ever subsided. but it somehow got worse. grah.

yes i feel so homework obsessed. this is so unhealthy. homework homework homework. woooooohoooooooooooo. can you feel the ground sha-sha-shakinggg?

ah. i'm so self-amused. F_. im being driven insane.

why do all good things come to an end?

2007-02-18T12:31:00.000+08:00

i haven't been blogging cause nothing really interesting has been happening in my life.

aside from that, i've been pretty annoyed mainly cause its chinese new year and the teachers have given quite a considerable amount of work. grah. not forgetting the 2 projects which are due in 2 weeks or so and i haven't even started on them.

oh and i had a strange dream last night. it was kind of a bad dream. but it wasn't exactly a nightmare. more like a sad dream. i don't really know why but it's going to leave me thinking about it for some time. i rarely have dreams.

choose the one who loves you more.

2007-02-11T22:18:00.000+08:00

Rain rain rain on my mind
I've got a secret life
Wipe wipe wipe it away
Nothing can make me dry

Fight all the while
Fight till I think I'm free
Fear reigns so we never see beautiful secret lives.

It could make you face all your fears
It could make you face all your fears

Oh, smile smile in the day
Fear takes its place at night
Oh, oh, pretty in the rain
I love your secret life

It could make you face all your fears
It could make you face all your fears

I could leave you well enough alone,
Believing you'd be overcome
and gone by grace away
Better off than if I stay

I could leave you walk away
We'll save it for another day
Through all the wars I've come to know
It's punches pulled, not towels thrown in.

When they come knocking on your heart's door,
Choose the one who loves you more.
And when you've found something to die for,(Make you face all your fears)
They'll be knocking on your heart's door(Make you face all your fears)
When they come knocking on your heart's door,(Make you face all your fears)
Choose the one who loves you more.

My hand is on the trigger, I'm ready to ignite.

2007-02-10T23:18:00.000+08:00

I tried to drive all through the night,
The heat stroke ridden weather, the barren empty sights.
No oasis here to see, the sand is singing deathless words to me.
Can't you help me as I'm startin' to burn (all alone).
Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction.
My confidence is leaving me on my own (all alone).
No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention.

oh. on a random note, my left eyelid hasn't stopped twitching since 10pm. no i think i've been sleeping pretty early for the past few days. but well, maybe i'm a little stressed. still, it's as annoying as f_.

I don't wanna live on the moon. :D

2007-02-04T16:14:00.000+08:00

i always have a problem of waking up early on sundays. so yea. i went to church at 10 this morning to do school work with a few other halmmers. after that it was combined choir prac again.

the fan is just ownage. pure pwnz0r. we were tossing paper balls at the fan and its defence is just GG. after that it was dodgeball. damn it was just insane. raffles 1 : others 0. xD. and then hockey/floorball thing with brooms we found randomly around the church. i laughed so hard that i couldn't breathe.

okay. rubbish games as such and waking up early on weekends make me tired and i seriously need to take a nap now.

Don't you cry tonight; there's a heaven above you, baby.

2007-01-31T20:02:00.000+08:00

i'm really really really mad.

you were telling me something. and you frigging insulted a friend. even when it was totally out of context.

sometimes i really wonder if you really say hurtful remarks seriously. how can you try and talk to me the next time as if nothing happened. it's frigging annoying. frigging annoying.

i've been in a really bad mood these few days and this just made it worse.

why cant you just, think before you say anything. or just, stop talking to me. i don't want to listen.

okay. typing all that made me feel slightly better.

And please remember that I never lied
And please remember how I felt inside now honey
You gotta make it your own way
But you'll be allright now sugar
You'll feel better tomorrow
Come the morning light now baby

Don't you cry tonight
I still love you baby
Don't you cry tonight
Don't you cry tonight
There's a heaven above you baby
And don't you cry tonight

don't cry ;
guns n' roses

my fall will be for you.

2007-01-29T21:47:00.000+08:00

We used to swim the same moonlight waters
Oceans away from the wakeful day

My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
If you be the one to cut me
I'll bleed forever

Scent of the sea before the waking of the world
Brings me to thee
Into the blue memory

My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
If you be the one to cut me
I'll bleed forever

Into the blue memory

The siren from the deep came to me
Sang my name my longing
Still I write my songs about that dream of mine
Worth everything I may ever be

The Child will be born again
That siren carried him to me
First of them true loves
Singing on the shoulders of an angel
Without care for love 'n loss

Bring me home or leave me be
My love in the dark heart of the night
I have lost the path before me
The one behind will lead me

Take me, Cure me, Kill me, Bring me home
Every way, Every day
Just another loop in the hangman's noose

Take me, cure me, kill me, bring me home
Every way, every day
I keep on watching us sleep

Relive the old sin of Adam and Eve
Of you and me
Forgive the adoring beast

Redeem me into childhood
Show me myself without the shell
Like the advent of May
I'll be there when you say
Time to never hold our love

My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
You were the one to cut me
So I'll bleed forever

ghost love score ;
nightwish

seize the day.

2007-01-17T18:53:00.000+08:00

shrugggs. back to school. so boring. such a routine.

i think i'm going crazy.

like, back to the motion baybehhhh. woohooooo. : D.

2006-12-18T19:56:00.000+08:00

damn school is opening in 2 weeks? damnnnn. i don't feel prepared for the next year of shit at all. ah well. who cares? i can just treat it as a challenge. WOOHOO. challenges are so challenging. don't you think so? yes i love challenging challenges. well, sometimes.

okay. back to the topic of challenges.

training is so challenging. grace and i are finally back at bishan training. it was so challenging to get ourselves back there since coach didn't really let us return.

and footwork is so challenging. the courts at bishan are pretty slippery. due to the long break grace and i had before returning, footwork has become a challenge since we get tired more easily. so we had to prevent ourselves from skating across the floor, and not cheat. what a challenge.

and then came the challenging multiple shuttles. this is the first freaking time i've worn glasses to training. damn damn damn. i cracked my ok lens a few days ago while washing them. graaah. i probably wouldn't get the replacements until after christmas cause that lens company is happily enjoying themselves celebrating christmas. : /. oh well. so i had to stick with my glasses, which kept sliding down my nose. this made multiple shuttles really challenging cause i had to keep pushing up my glasses. WOOHOO. how challenging. i love multiple shuttles. :DDDDDDDD.

and then came physical exercises. climbing big stairs. damn this is so challenging cause i haven't done this in like, 6 months? and this thing seriously leaves you with jelly legs and bad muscle aches which disallow you to sit properly for a few days. HOW CHALLENGING. yes. so i love climbing stairs cause the process and effects are challenging.

oh yes, i twisted my ankle. so there is this sharp pain at my ankle joint when i walk. oh well. its okay. now it's more challenging to walk. yay. :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

so my holidays are pretty much packed. with training and carolling and camps. carolling is pretty challenging too. it's like. you got to reach the high notes and be loud. how challenging. yes. lovely challenges. :DDDDDD.

ah. this pretty much sums up my holidays. pretty much a routine. routines can be so monotonous to follow sometimes. oh well. but its challenging to stick to routines. yes, i love routines. :DDDDDD.

okay. so this post is rather whacked. don't mind me. i was just challenging myself to write a lame (and rather sarcarstic) post. what a wonderful challenge.

i like challenges. how about you? :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

this could all end in tragedy.

2006-12-03T00:59:00.000+08:00

damnnnnnn. the holidays are passing so quickly. too quickly.

with all the choir practices and trainings and weird random shit happening, i haven't really been having good sleeping habits. in fact almost everyday i sleep at 3am and wake up either pretty early or pretty late.

ah. i'm just lazy.

on a random note, grace and i are planning to crash bishan training. but we guess not. cause coach will seriously whack us. heh.

and it should be time that i found out something new about myself. my life is too full of 'i don't know's.

damn i feel pessimistic.

oh the grace in your eyes overcomes any fall.

2006-11-18T23:41:00.000+08:00

two weeks of slogging in school every day despite it being the holidays.

two weeks with a crazy schedule when i'm out from morning till late nights.

two weeks of heavy eyelids and dark eye rings.

all over today. just one day.

well i guess the production was pretty successful. i don't know whether to feel happy or sad. but i guess i can safely say i'm relieved. two weeks of crazy shit when we had to paint flats and prepare props for the play. plus lost sleep due to worrying about the outcome of the next day. i don't know but i guess i can finally rest well after today.

at least i hope i can. who knows what other stuff could actually pop up and disrupt my holidays. : /.

: ).

: D

2006-11-14T23:40:00.000+08:00

i haven't blogged for a long long time.

mainly cause i'm damn damn busy.

and blogger is being a pita.

haha. freaking eyebags. i hate them. but oh well. : D.

welcome to the black parade.

2006-10-28T23:29:00.000+08:00

post eoy and i still have a pretty tight schedule.

my math results were damn suck omg. 13/55. lowest in class. great. argh but heck that for now.

i blew almost 60 bucks in a week on 3 albums.

muse's black holes and revelations for my brother's birthday present, we are scientists' with love and squalor, and my chemical romance's the black parade.

i didn't intend to buy the mcr album at all. but it just got released on the shelf and i got tempted to buy it.

and i think it's damn good shit. darn. i gotta admit i'm emo shit.

darn darn darn. i love the new album to bits.

damn.

2006-10-15T20:09:00.000+08:00

Turn on Windows Media Player/Winamp/whatever you use for MP3s and put it in shuffle mode. For every question, press 'next song'.Enter title to answer the question.

1. How does the world see me?
Demon of the fall - Opeth

2. Will I have a happy life?
...And we all have a hell - From First To Last

3. What do my friends really think of me?
Rest in pieces - Saliva

4. Do people secretly lust after me?
Lies - Evanescence

5. How can you be happy?
Head first for halos - My Chemical Romance

6. What should I do with my life?
Stairway to heaven - Led Zeppelin

7. Why must life be so full of pain?
Cemetery drive - My Chemical Romance

8. Will I ever have children?
This photograph is proof (I know you know) - Taking Back Sunday

9. Will I die happy?
I won't see you tonight (part 2) - Avenged Sevenfold

10. What is some good advice for me?
They perched on their stilts, pointing and daring me to break custom - Saosin

11. What is happiness?
Warmness on the soul - Avenged Sevenfold

12. What's my favourite fetish?
The way you want it - Keane

13. How will I be remembered?
Leave like a ghost (drive away) - The Juliana Theory

14. What is your love life like?
Why does it always rain on me? - Travis

15. What's your life motto?
Running away - Hoobastank

16. What do your parents think of you?
The jetset life is gonna kill you - My Chemical Romance

17. What's your favorite hobby?
Drowning lessons - My Chemical Romance

18. What does your best friend really think of you?
Sunsets and car crashes - The Spill Canvas

19. What's the worst thing about you?
Run- Snow Patrol

20. Describe your mind.
Opaline - Dishwalla

21. How will you die?
Where is your boy tonight? - Fall Out Boy

22. How does your crush feel about you?
Skeptics and true believers - The Academy Is

23. What is your wedding going to be like?
Cute without the e - Taking Back Sunday

24. What about your honeymoon?
Existentialism on prom night - Straylight Run

25. Describe the last day of your life.
Vertigo - U2

26. Why does life suck?
Polygraph, right now! - The Spill Canvas

27. Why does life rule?
Make this go on forever - Snow Patrol

28. What will you be famous for?
Sophomore slump or comeback of the year - Fall Out Boy

29. What's the craziest thing you'll ever do?
Skylines and Turnstiles - My Chemical Romance

30. Will you achieve your goals?
Slow down - The Academy Is

31. What will your future job be like?
Lost symphonies - Saosin

32. And your party life?
City of blinding lights - U2

33. Overall, will you be happy?
Somewhere only we know - Keane

34. Or will you just deal with it?
Those words are not enough - Reliant K

just a little quiz thingy to amuse myself for a while. xD.

haha. i hate to say this but i did nothing on friday and the weekends. GG crystal.

anyway. exams start tomorrow.

can't wait for friday. : D.

but still i need to study. >.<

anyway. hiatus for a week again.

the months they don't matter, it's the days I can't take.

2006-10-01T23:36:00.000+08:00

exams are coming so soon. so soon. ah. 2 weeks. darn thing starts on my birthday. fruggit. : /. why can't it start one week earlier?!

anyway. quick post. im gonna go on hiatus till the end of exams or something.

thursday training. played with coach + crazy agility exercises. bloody frog jump thingy made me get really really really wobbly legs. and the rest of training just made them worse. graaahahaha. muscle aches when i got home.

friday. died trying to climb/go down stairs. argh. i hate muscle aches. did rs after school. transferred the lone successfully-budded plant to a new medium. haha. one plant. haha.

saturday. choir. was a loser again. i had to hop down stairs cause that damn muscle ache really aches. i decided to skip a step. and i realised my leg couldn't take the shock when i landed since the height sort of increased. so it gave way and i slid 2 steps down. @_@. shocking. at least i didn't slide the whole way down. : O.

damn. why is loser disease stuck with me for so long?!

sunday. woke up hell late. 12pm. went to city hall area with family. window shopped. grah. shopping with the family is uber boring. my dad only looks at shoes/electronics. my mum only looks at displays. my brother only talks to me about his games. graaah.

went home for a while and then i had to go for some dinner at bishan cc. some inter-con games closing ceremony thing? wa liao. damn lame la. i don't want to take part in the competition next year. ><.

okay. now im back here. kinda late. argh. i need a confi name. i need to start mugging. i need to ditch loser disease. i need to get adequate sleep. i need to ditch muscle aches. blah.

okay. hiatus for 3 weeks.

i better.

yay. no school tomorrow. cause of some school excellence award thingy. but i'm going to use it to study ss. haha.

study ss.

i better.

my fork in the road (your knife in my back)

2006-09-29T23:25:00.000+08:00

wtfux. my mood is so ruined.

so my dad was hogging the computer. and when he finally decided to get off, he spotted my wallet on the table and decided to open it. for some reason i didn't like that. i mean out of the blue you just open someone's wallet? like no right. and somehow i knew he would start making stupid comments again.

so i got pretty worked up and all. and made a dive to snatch the wallet out of his hands la. this sounds damn drama but heck. so in the process i accidentally made this disc on the table drop. and then his response was like.

"orh. you see la. drop the disc. spoil your cd."

"no it's not my cd."

"then you spoil your brother's cd la."

"i don't know la. it's not labelled."

"orh. so you don't want the cd la. throw away."

and he effing took it and threw it into the effing dustbin. wtfux.

that wasn't all. my good charlotte cd happened to be underneath the cd he picked up. and he went.

"so this cd also don't want la? throw away."

and he effing took it and threw it into the effing dustbin. again.

i know my dad reads my blog. but then again, wtfux.

i'll never let you go, if you promise not to fade away.

2006-09-27T18:58:00.000+08:00

i pwn all other noobs.

this morning i was really really really really tired. i almost couldn't wake up in the car. argh. so i told my dad to pick me up after school.

slogged through lessons as usual. then cca. then...

AS USUAL, I TOOK THE BUS HOME.

haha. and my dad waited for me in school for a whole hour, until i got home at 6.30 and realised my dad was supposed to pick me up.

gjgj. pwnz0r.

damn. i go home by myself everyday la. after training, after school. and i actually forgot. omg. i don't know whether it was because i was too used to the routine of going home by myself or i was too tired to remember that my dad was supposed to pick me, or simply that i have very very very very terrible memory.

nevertheless,

ownage.

these thoughts run through my head, over and over.

2006-09-24T21:48:00.000+08:00

saturday was gabriel's piano retical after choir and mass. rushed to the esplanade after church and then had dinner after the retical. it was a total laughing session. mainly for wrong reasons. : /.

and today i woke up at 10. damn. chionged homework for a while. went for cat class and dinner. then continued. well, i finished most of it, i guess. left with revising chem qualitative analysis and history sbq.

and i'm quite mad at myself for that. as in, not finishing all my work over the weekends. what is this. i could have woken up early on saturday and sunday instead of waking up at 10. and i could have done some work on friday night instead of wasting my time away. arghh.

i hate this but i'm feeling like some emo shit again.

Q: Why can’t you just be happy.
Live up to your first impression.

A: Well my best side was your worst invention.

i am as humble as a pie.

2006-09-22T23:48:00.000+08:00

been slogging for PTs and homework nonsense so no time to post.

i'm damn tired. and i have panda eyes! ) : . ew. much as i love getting blue-blacks, dark circles don't count as them.

bah. i feel slightly annoyed yesterday. i thought that i could sleep early and not burn the midnight oil to finish my pts or something. so i finished all my pts on wednesday. and in the end, i found a very very major mistake in my chem pt and i had to re-do half of it. : \. slept at 1.30am. ewww.

so today was loser day. i was damn loser today. ah. im so tired now. i don't want to elaborate how i was loserish today. so i shall just. shruggritoff. lol.

i think im going crazy. 4 hours of sleep last night. school till 4.30. reached home at 5.30. wanted to go down to bishan sports hall for training or something. but too late. so i suddenly felt like jogging and i did. jogged half of bishan park nonstop. then did circuits. sort of.

my brother thinks im crazy. cause i could have gotten heat exhaustion and my brain can go gong. tiredness increases the chances of heat exhaustion. : / graaah.

pts are finally over. but i have a hell lot of homework this weekend.

chem Qualitative Analysis
math Assignment
english Mini debate proposition points?
chinese Mock paper (i freaking hate this. i wish i could slap this. argh)
physics Assigment
history SBQ

oh man. wth did i type this down. not like its going to help me or something.

shucks. nothing i type really links. im so tired. im going gong without heat exhaustion already. freaaak.

oh yes. new mp3. : ). my mizuno court shoes coming up soon. : D

and damn. i hate looking so buay song when i don't smile.

zz.

i want eoys to end. freak. when everyone's eoys end. rg's start. ewww. week 6. week 6 please end.

damn you homework. you leave me no time to revise and study. so much for independent learning. my foot.

my stinking foot.

emotion is dead.

2006-09-11T22:31:00.000+08:00

first day of school was lethargic. my eyes were so tired that i dont know how to describe how tired they were.

so lessons were really blah. and bio was rather amusing. only at the start. started to struggle to keep awake at the end. we left one window open to air the classrooms. and the bio teacher was like:"why did you leave one window open? someone farted?" oh man. actually no one really laughed la. but i don't know why i laugh at everything. -_-".

after school decided not to go for cca but go home to sleep. heh. stayed back a while to talk to peiting while she waited for yunting and charlene to finish orals. then went home and popped by j8 for a while to get my bro's wow game card.

okay. so i napped from 4.30 till 9.30. 5 hours. i think im going to sleep again. wake up at 4 or 5 am or something to study math. maybe i study better in the morning.

im so tempted to quote this.

time flies like an arrow -->

HAHA. okay. im just amusing myself. -.-"

2006-09-10T21:13:00.000+08:00

school is reopening tomorrow. time flies. it's the last term for the year already. in another 6 weeks it will be my end of years. damn. i don't know how i'm going to get through this year's without breaking down halfway through or something. already i don't know any shit about how to do math. no idea about my sciences either.

i'm in deep shit man. okay. forget about it now. i got more urgent stuff to think about. oh, but don't i always have urgent stuff to settle? wth.

anyway. saturday was pretty much a slack day again. planned to do physics pt, again. and didn't do anything about it, again. choir. : D. then icekimo for a short while cause they chased us out. then a few of us decided to go watch a movie. we went to nicole's house and watched metallica. i think they are really good man. i mean. even the singer sounds as good live as on his cd. then we watched fearless. got home at about 3.30am. and slept at 4.

this should be the holidays man. but most of its days ended up with me slogging from early morning till night doing pts, though i had the occasionally trainings on certain days.

today i woke up at 8.15. heh. 4 hours of sleep. went to play badminton with halmmers again. and frisbee after that. it was really quite amusing. hahaha. lunch nearby and then studied for math later.

i think i'm starting to fall really behind for my studies. i should go anti-social for 6 weeks or something.

2006-09-08T23:00:00.000+08:00

ehehehe. i found this on talkingcock.com.

CORRIGHT

The proper and correct Singlish pronunciation of 'correct'; illustrates how Singlish can combine two related words, creating a new word with improved potency. Often used as a response when the truth is glaringly obvious.

okay nvm.

was forced to alight at toa payoh while taking the mrt home from training yesterday. ahhh. it stopped at novena for 10 minutes somemore. : /. had to take the bus 88 home then.

arghh. annoying trip. despite having my mp3 at quite a volume, i could still hear this uncle complaining damn loudly to his wife. wth man. every sentence he said had the phrase 'kan ni na' in it. omg. its bloody irritating la. i was seriously very very annoyed. wth is this man.

so finally tolerated till the bus reached bishan. was glad to get down. then i realised that the ah pek also got down at the same stop. wth. continuous 'knn' again. wth la.

and then the 162 came. like finally. pretty glad it came. and then that ah pek had to take the same bus as me. wthhhhhhhh. and so i got up the bus and decided to sit near the back. and they had to sit directly behind me.

wth.

so today was completely slack. i don't know whether it was a waste of time. i dont want to know. i did nothing at all. nothing la. kind of ew, but i prefer this to working hard on the damn projects all day. but then again, i sort of chose to suffer later then suffer now when i can suffer less.

oh. there was no electricity in the morning till early afternoon cause of some rewiring thing for the whole block. that made me not feel like doing anything. cause i planned to do physics pt today.

i found a song which isn't very distracting. as in. a song i won't start singing along to and forget about my work.

Our time is running out
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out

time is running out ;
muse.

haha. quite self-explanatory though. this song somehow brainwashes me to panic about finishing my work asap.

well. kind of. ><.

okay. guilty feelings coming in. come on. i don't want to feel this way. why can't i have a slack day without feeling bad about not using my time wisely?

We fight currents in the water when we can't let go of the shore.

2006-09-06T17:30:00.000+08:00

oh man. i kinda feel darn pissed off with myself.

well. so i finished ss pt this morning. felt quite happy about that. not that i put in a lot of effort or anything. cause i didn't. :.

then i decided to start on history pt. with all the procrastinating and all in between. and now i'm halfway through the shit. and now i'm darn confused and angry. cause i think that what i've done so far isn't fulfilling the damn task.

which means that i would have to start all over again.

shiiiiiiiiiiit. unless i can tweak it a bit. so that it will be less out-of-point.

sigh.

In the middle of the night

I hear your voice,

I feel ashamed every time you say,

"Car crash came and car crash went

So I went along with it"

Don't look away

I need to know if this is real

Don't look away

I need to know when will this end?

Don't look away

Keep crashing this car, over and over.

the other side of the crash/over and out(of control) ;

thursday.

snowed under.

2006-09-05T13:21:00.000+08:00

watched click with sheena yesterday. quite funny i must say. and the ending was rather sad. until the whole plot took a twist again. then i thought it was anti-climax. -_-".

got home. played a bit of wow. then continued with the damn ss pt. siiiigh. i had planned to sleep at 12am. wake up early. but i got dragged into this. mass convo.

wthh. everyone had the same nicks. -.-"

and it went pretty much like this till almost 2am i think. cause i fell asleep at the computer. hahaha. ><.

okay. that's damn noob la. but i think i should stop typing this and continue with pts.

ewwww.

2006-09-01T22:24:00.000+08:00

i actually went to school today. haha. i feel so freaking no-life. there was no one else in school la. except a few sec1s. heh.

so i woke up at 7.30 this morning. had a fever, flu, sore throat and very very bad muscle ache.

freak la. but i decided to go to school anyway. so i dragged myself down to school, feeling the worst i had ever felt in the entire year so far, since i hadn't fallen sick until now. reached school at 9.

waited for everyone to come until 11.30. we were supposed to meet at 8.30, and i thought i was late. -.-".

okay. so we started work, stuffing corn flour into balloons, while alicia and tiddy went out to buy our lunch back. then worked till about 1.30, when they came back with lunch. then tiddy and alicia went out again to eat lunch with their national camp platoon mate.

so zoe yikai michelle and i were left eating our lunches in school and talking rubbish. and after lunch. yikai initiated some game. she volunteered to be a target, while the rest of us took the flour-stuffed balloons to aim and throw at her. -.-". and there were different levels of difficulty and it was some kind of competition game thingy to see who could score the highest points la. hahaha.

then michelle had to go. and zoe yikai and i started fooling around with another game. haha. we took brooms. and i crushed a piece of paper into a ball. then we set up different 'goalposts' and started whacking the paper ball to our own goals like some hockey game.

lmao.

i laughed so freaking much that my stomach hurt like hell. ><.

played a bit of guitar after that. and then tiddy and alicia came back at 4. and we started the serious work again, till 5. then we went home.

hahaha! i feel damn amused. initially i was feeling really horrible about being ill and all. and after all that crap. i felt much much much better. though my nose was still blocked. : ).

okay. now im starting on my ss pt again. but i've been procrastinating for so long. ew. im telling lucas about the ss pt now. doing environmental citizenship:Waste management in Singapore.

Butterboy says:
shit, man. would a p4 kid be interested in finding out about how the country deals with its own crap?
Butterboy says:
i would think that the waste would be the waste that could potentially cause environmental problems lah.
Butterboy says:
so non biodegradeables?
Butterboy says:
i mean you probably don't want to talk about the treatment of raw sewage to a kid right.

Butterboy says:
its supposed to encourge environmental citizenship among kids right?
Butterboy says:
so its the waste that they can help prevent lah.
Butterboy says:
or deal with.
Butterboy says:
kids, please eat those empty milk cartons.
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
LOL OMG
Butterboy says:
yar well. you know. kids that age are usually pesky.

Butterboy says:
so how?
Butterboy says:
quite easy right.
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
hehee
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
okay la
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
just a pain in the ass to rephrase websites
Butterboy says:
if your target market is 12 year olds, why must you do so much research?
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
cause i dont know any shit about shit!
Butterboy says:
ar.
Butterboy says:
nice one.
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
hehehe
Butterboy says:
i had this whole book about environmental citizenship.
Butterboy says:
and its aimed at kids.
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
lol
Butterboy says:
not sure if i still have it.
wonderboy... what is the secret of your power? [lmao.] says:
sounds like something you throw at kids
Butterboy says:
hahaha!
Butterboy says:
occasionally that is not a bad idea.
Butterboy says:
don't you hate those evil kids?
Butterboy says:
those devil children?

Butterboy says:
its true, those devil children. they scream and kick and cry and run and stamp and i just want to make the world a better place.

hahaha. that cracks me up. okay okay. i better start with the pt now and stop typing this. ><

Something in me was dying.

2006-08-31T20:51:00.000+08:00

finally. a break. actually not really. but at least i can still manage my time like how i want it to be. rather than go through the routine of waking up at 6 every morning. grr.

anyway. teachers' day celebrations today. batch07, the skit rocked! : D. darn. we thought the skit wasn't funny enough. but in the end the audience's response was really really good. : ). i fumbled when i was saying my first line though. i was like. im the ge-geography teacher. heh.

went back to st nicks after celebrations. they already ended school by then. but still met a few of the 6j people. : ). ate lunch from the orange bowl stall. i swear st nicks food beats the one in rgs by 99999999999 times man.

went home. then went for training.

now im having pretty bad muscle aches. ><. i think the musclepower77 is pretty nice to use. grah. why did i have to keep sticking to the other racket. i won _ in one game today. quite surprised actually. cause i expected myself to get thrashed really badly. since i haven't trained for 5 weeks or so and my lobbing and footwork were crap for the past 3 trainings. anyhow, i had a few tyco shots. hehe.

so now im back. gotta start chionging pts if i want to have time for stuff other than work work work. : D.

and blah. im falling sick. darn flu. ):. i can't breathe properly. and i sound flat when i sing. ><. ewww.

Why can't we say what we're thinking of?

2006-08-28T21:13:00.000+08:00

sheesh. i feel so noob.

i was playing with my name tag during bio lesson today. cause i was rather bored la. then i was jabbing holes in this piece of cardboard.

so i was happily jabbing holes in that cardboard. and i accidentally pierced the surface of my finger skin through with the name tag. haha. gjgj crystal.

wah lao. so i was staring at the sight of a needle pierced through my finger skin. and then i was thinking,"eh. actually if the needle can pierce through my finger skin. that means im not very thick skin la. haha."

i can't believe i actually thought of such bullshit at that situation.

and then it started to hurt so i pulled the needle out. -.-". and the blood oozed out from the cut like nobody's business. crap. and then there was this tiny blob of red on the skin surface. and i was thinking,"haha. this looks like water tension. oh, maybe not. it's like. blood tension."

graaaah. should stop thinking of this kind of crap. hehh. currently i feel rather nonchalant towards everything. maybe the 3rd year in rg has finally caused my mind to be sapped away of emotion. cause of all the hectic schedules and lost sleep.

zombie-fied.

I miss the part,
when we were moving forward now
On our way down
But maybe someday,
I'll be something more than love
Just know I'll never tell

And when you're on your way down
Through the clouds
And you're waiting for your body's re-entry again

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
Why can't we say what we're thinking of

I'm missing parts,
now that you've told me everything
On our way down
And I was blessed,
and I've forgotten how to love
You said you'd never tell

And when you're on your way down
Through the clouds
And you're waiting for your body's re-entry again

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
Why can't we say what we're thinking of

Not even I will tell,

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
We say these things to know they're real.

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
Why can't we say what we're thinking of

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the one's we've loved
We speak in different voices
We speak in different voices

To know they're real. Real.
I'll never tell.

voices ;
saosin.

i don't want tomorrow to come. yet it always comes and goes. i don't want thursday to come. yet i want to breeze through it as quick as possible. sheesh. i don't want to performmmmmmmmm. i dislike being noticed or in attention. arghhhh.

2006-08-25T23:48:00.000+08:00

hoho. i'm not reading for isp mass anymore.

apparently uncle henry called another person to do the readings cause i didn't reply his message to confirm that im reading. not that i didn't reply on purpose la! i just thought it was an sms you dont need to reply. cause it goes like. "hi crystal. you have been selected to do the readings for isp mass...". and it doesn't go like. "hi crystal. do you want to do the readings for isp mass..."

harhar. : /.

anyway. very very tired today. and im still sleeping so late. i just wasted another day. today and yesterday and wednesday. arghh. shit la. could have done sooo much.

i don't know what's happening. or could it just be that i am too oversensitive?

2006-08-24T22:12:00.000+08:00

aw man. i just snacked. lol.

half a tube of pringles somemore! omgg. ><.

tastes good, feels bad. graaaaah.

i feel my throat getting sore. and im getting ulcers already. : /.

noo. gotta stop snacking. : |.